In August 2024, my appendix exploded. No polite warning…just rupture. ER. Surgery. Reset button smashed.
At the time, I was 673 days into a movement practice I had carved out of nothing. Not luck. Not talent. Just daily, intentional choice. I had stopped and started for years before that streak. Failed. Restarted. Failed again. But this time, I held on. For 673 days, I moved my body. Every. Single. Day.
And it worked. My body worked. No pain. No hesitation. I lived in rhythm. I moved through the world strong, clear-headed, balanced. Then…bam…appendectomy. Pause. A pause that nearly swallowed me. Stress poured in. My movement faltered. My discipline cracked. And by midsummer, my right pinky started going numb. My grip felt wrong. My strength wasn’t there. My body was speaking, and the message was clear:
You abandoned me. Come back.
So I did. I returned to intentional movement, and today marks 44 days. Slowly, steadily, I am strengthening the weak muscles. The tight ones are releasing. The numbness has disappeared. Balance returned. Not by accident. Not by luck. By choice.
And here’s what I know…Massage can help you find calm. It can reset, restore, and guide you back to yourself. But the real work? The real transformation? That’s you. Sitting with yourself. Moving with intention. Every. Single. Day. It doesn’t have to be heavy lifting or Olympic medals. It can be tai chi, yoga, walking, stretching, dancing in your kitchen like a fool while blasting Florence + the Machine’s Everybody Scream, moving like the ceiling can’t hold you (the iguana approves). It doesn’t matter what you choose. It matters that you choose.
Momentum is a force. When you feed it, it feeds you back. Suddenly, you’re clearer, lighter, stronger. You sleep better. You think sharply. Your emotions are steady. And your body remembers: oh yes, this is how I was built to move. But momentum works both ways. Ignore your body long enough, and it will whisper. Then it will yell. Then it will shut down. Mine shut down with a scalpel. Yours might be subtler…but no less urgent.
If you want. Big life free of discomfort it doesn’t come from playing it safe. It doesn’t come from staying numb, or small, or waiting for someone else to fix you. A big life comes from refusing to quit on yourself. From showing up when it’s inconvenient. moving when you’d rather stay still.
So here’s my call to you:
Don’t wait until your appendix ruptures. Don’t wait until numbness sets in. Don’t wait until your body forces you. Move. Now. Softly, strongly, intentionally…however you can. Choose yourself, daily. Even if you fall off, come back. Always come back. And if you need help? If you need the noise calmed, the tension softened, the first step made easier…come spend an hour on the table with me. Let’s begin there.
Because your body remembers, your spirit remembers. And somewhere inside, you already know: you were made for a big life. So blast Florence. Scream until your lungs burn. Dance until the floor shakes. Put down the screen and let your body remind you what it means to be alive.
“Here, I can take up the whole of the sky
Unfurling, becoming my full size
And look at me burst through the ceiling.”
The iguana’s on the floor, thrashing like it’s gospel…your move.